Nipton was next on the digger’s revenge-driven route
His blood-spattered violent desert commute
But when Digger Omar entered this village
He saw nothing but remnants of bloodshed and pillage
Tons of corpses smoking in heaps and on crosses
And in the center one of the Legion’s big bosses
Vulpes Inculta (the fox) did this deed
A righteous prissy in an asshole’s elite
A voice like bathwater, a nice wolfskin hood
A strong sense of mission (as he well should)
Vulpes stopped - for a moment - to pull the legs off flies
And took some care to explain Nipton’s demise
“Nipton, you see, was town full of whores,
So we put them on crosses to teach them some mores”
“While I don’t like your motives, I do like your style”
“And I dig your helmets” said Omar with a smile
A smile full of malice, a smile full of ice
“I dig yonder helmet, pray sir, name your price”
“The thing’s not for sale, it’s an honor to wear”
“How dare you ask?” quoth Vulpes with a glare
“I’d think, I’d ask first” said Omar full of guile
and then spammed frags at the soldiers in file
And the legion went up and the legion came down
some more blood, guts and gibs in dead Nipton town
And out came the digger to root through the corpses
Got a nice comfy helmet from great Caesar’s forces
“Legion’s infamy gained” says a box in the sky
“No prob” says the digger as he moseys on by
This you should know about the man with the spade
If he can’t pay with caps, he’ll remit by grenade
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